A man recently married his Girl Friend and he faced some problems, so he called Microsoft Technical Support...
Dear Microsoft Technical Support:
I am desperate for some help. I recently upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that the new program began giving unexpected errors and also took up a lot of space and valuable resources. This wasn't mentioned in the product brochure.
In addition Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and
launches during system initialization where it monitors all other system activity.
Applications such as Boys Night Out 2.5, and Football 5.3 no longer run and crash the system whenever selected. Attempting to operate Saturday Sports
Bar 6.3 always fails but Saturday Shopping 7.1 runs instead.
I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background whilst attempting to
run any of my favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to
Girlfriend 7.0 but uninstall doesn't work on this program.
With regards,
Joy
THE REPLY FROM MICROSOFT: -
Dear Joe,
This is a very common problem resulting from a basic misunderstanding. Many men upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0
to Wife 1.0 thinking that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program. Whereas Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM designed by its creator
to runeverything.
You are unlikely to be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to
Girlfriend 7.0 as Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this and it is
impossible to uninstall, delete or purge the program files from the
system once installed.
Some people have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or wife 2.0 but have
ended up with even more problems. (See in manual under alimony Support and Solicitors Fees).
Having Wife 1.0 installed myself I recommend you keep it installed and deal with the difficulties as best you can. When any faults or problems occur, whatever you think has caused them, you must run the C: \I APOLOGISE program and avoid attempting to use the *Esc-key.
It may be necessary to run C:\ I APOLOGISE a number of times but
hopefully eventually the operating system will return to normal. Wife
1.0 although a very high maintenance program can be very rewarding.
To get the most out of it consider buying additional software such as
Flowers 2.0 and Chocolates 5.0. Do not under any circumstances install Secretary 36.24.36 (Short Skirt version) as this is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and the system will almost certainly crash.
Thank you for using the program!!
With Regards
Micro-Soft Help DESK
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